By Rev. Daniel Miranda
It’s one of those things that is difficult to admit, accept, and live with: getting older with all its realities, both good and not-so-good. Most of us like to think of the wisdom and experiences we might have acquired. On the other hand, we might be aware of the aches and pains and the likely increased medical cost to stay healthier.
What many of us may not be as aware of is our ability to be flexible. And I mean both in terms of our bodies and in terms of our minds. When I was younger, my parents would talk about feeling stiff after sitting for extended periods of time. I now understand what they meant.
I am also now aware that as we age, many, if not most, of us find it difficult to make changes without significant effort. We begin to hear ourselves saying things like, “That’s the way it’s always been done,” “I don’t understand kids nowadays,” or “What is happening in the world?” I remember hearing some versions of these phrases from my parents, and I’m sure they also heard them from their parents.
Yes, the world is changing, and it may feel like the sky is falling. The church is changing, too, and many don’t like the way it’s changing. Some of these changes are out of our control. Some require us to question and take some action, while others require that we be flexible.
What I have discovered in myself is that I need to take a deep breath, think, pray, and ask myself: “Is this situation out of my control?” Trying to change things that are out of my control can use up too much energy and deplete me so much that I don’t have the energy or focus to work on the things I can impact.
Perhaps it is something I believe I truly need to question and possibly act on. It is easy to worry and fret over things without asking: What can I do? When am I going to take this action? What resources do I need? It can take a lot of time, but it can also be rewarding to play a part in affecting even some small part of things that need to be challenged.
For me, the most difficult option is the last one: being flexible. Sometimes, I don’t like the way things change; it may feel uncomfortable, strange, or even wrong. However, those observations may simply be my own feelings, my inflexibility, and my discomfort, not necessarily whether a particular change is bad or wrong.
As I said, as I get older, the lines sometimes blur between my perceptions, comforts, and inflexibility versus change that is helpful, necessary, and good. I wonder what it would be like if when things change in our churches, in our conference, and in our neighborhoods; before we make judgments, we first take a deep breath, think, pray, and ask ourselves if this change might actually be for good.
Rev. Daniel Miranda serves as superintendent of the Inland and Seven Rivers Districts of the Pacific Northwest Annual Conference of The United Methodist Church.
